Disney's FastPlay

Background
Disney's FastPlay is an enhancement for Disney-released DVDs, introduced in the late summer of 2004. While it claims to play the movie and bonus features automatically, it instead plays selected trailers on the DVD, followed by the movie coming immediately afterwards – the average length of all the trailers combined is 8-12 minutes.

(August 17, 2004-)
Nicknames: "Slow Play", "Scam Play", "Glitter Disc", "Where's the Remote?!", "Your First Panic/Anxiety Attack"

Logo: The Disney DVD logo (with a mirrored arc, seemingly to match with the FastPlay logo) shines on a cloudy blue background. Tinker Bell flies up and waves her wand on the Disney DVD logo, changing it into the FastPlay logo, and then flies away with her pixie dust trailing behind her. The pixie dust leaves behind two purple icons below the logo: "Main Menu" on the right (which appears first), and "FastPlay" on the left (which appears second). The Disney FastPlay logo "sparkles" throughout the logo. The Main Menu icon flashes twice, then the FastPlay icon flashes three times timed with the narration. The FastPlay logo shines and the logo fades out.

Variant: On several foreign Disney releases with FastPlay, the text is in their respective language, while the Korean and Chinese versions skip the Tinker Bell animation. The following variants are known to exist:
 * Japanese: "Disney's FastPlay", "ファストプレイ", "メイン・メニュー"
 * German: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Hauptmenü"
 * Portuguese: "Disney FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Menu Principal"
 * Spanish: "Disney FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Menú principal"
 * French: "Disney Fastoche", "Fastoche", "Menu principal"
 * Italian: "FastPlay Disney", "FastPlay", "Menu Principale"
 * Dutch: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Hoofdmenu"
 * Swedish: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Huvudmeny"
 * Norwegian: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Hovedmeny"
 * Danish: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Hovedmenu"
 * Korean: "Disney's 패스트 플레이", "패스트 플레이", "초기 메뉴"
 * Polish: "Disney's FastPlay", "Szybki Start", "Menu Główne"
 * Czech: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Hlavné menu"
 * Russian: "Disney's FastPlay", "ФАСТПЛЕЙ", "ГЛАВНОЕ МЕНЮ"
 * Finnish: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Päävalikko"
 * Mandarin: "迪士尼馬上看", "馬上看", "回主選单"
 * Arabic: "Disney's FastPlay", "تشغيل سريع", "القائمة الرئيسية"
 * Turkish: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Ana Menü"
 * Hungarian: "Disney's FastPlay", "Gyorsjátszás", "Főmenü"
 * Romanian: "Disney's FastPlay", "FastPlay", "Meniul Principal"
 * Greek: "Disney FastPlay", "Αυτόματη Έναρξη", "Κύριο Μενού"

FX/SFX: Pretty much everything in the logo.

Music/Sounds: A series of dings and whooshes with a short horn fanfare and a male announcer (Tom Kane, possibly) saying "This Disney DVD is enhanced with Disney's FastPlay. Your movie and a selection of bonus features will begin automatically. To bypass FastPlay, select the "Main Menu" button at any time. FastPlay will begin in a moment". This is translated for each international version, and is roughly the same spiel each time, specifically:
 * Japanese: "このDVDはディズニーファストプレイ仕様になっており. 本編に続いてオススメの映像特典が自動的に再生されます. ファーストプレーでご覧にならない場合はメニューボタンを押してください. まもなくファストプレイが始まります. " ("This DVD has the Disney FastPlay method. Along with the main story, some recommended special videos will be played automatically. If you don't want to see FastPlay, press the menu button. Shortly, FastPlay will begin.")
 * German: "Diese Disney-DVD ist mit Disneys FastPlay ausgestattet. Ihr Hauptfilm und eine Besteht der Auswahl von Extras starten automatisch. Um Disneys FastPlay zu umgehen, wählfen "Hauptmenü" fehen. Disneys FastPlay beginnt in wenigen Augenblicken." ("This Disney DVD is equipped with Disney's FastPlay. Your main film and a selection of extras will start automatically. To bypass Disney's FastPlay, select "Main Menu". Disney's FastPlay starts in a few moments.")
 * Portuguese (Brazil): "Este DVD da Disney foi equipado com o FastPlay da Disney. O filme e a seleção de bônus especiais iniciarão automaticamente. Para interromper o FastPlay, selecione a qualquer momento o botão "Menu principal". Disney FastPlay começará num instante." ("This Disney DVD was equipped with Disney's FastPlay. The film and the selection of special bonuses will start automatically. To stop FastPlay, select the "Main menu" button at any time. Disney FastPlay will start instantly.")
 * Spanish (Latin America): "Este DVD de Disney está mejorado con FastPlay de Disney. Tu película y una selección de materiales adicionales empezarán automáticamente. Para desactivar FastPlay, activa el botón "Menú principal" en cualquier momento. FastPlay comenzará en breve." ("This Disney DVD is enhanced with Disney FastPlay. Your movie and a selection of additional materials will start automatically. To deactivate FastPlay, activate the "Main Menu" button at any time. FastPlay will start shortly.")
 * Spanish (Spain): "Este DVD Disney está equipado con Disney FastPlay. Con FastPlay, la película y una selección de contenidos extra se iniciar automáticamente. Para anular el FastPlay, pulse el botón "Menú principal" en cualquier momento." ("This Disney DVD is equipped with Disney FastPlay. With FastPlay, the movie and a selection of bonus content start automatically. To cancel FastPlay, press the "Main Menu" button at any time.")
 * French: "La nouvelle fonction Disney Fastoche présente sur ce DVD permé aux plus petits de découvrir le contenu du DVD, films et bonus d'un seul clic. Pour accéder à tout moment le menu chez DVD, appuyez sur la touche menu de votre télécontrôle." ("The new Disney's FastPlay (lit. Easy) function on this DVD allows the little ones to discover the content of the DVD, films and bonuses with one click. To access the DVD menu at any time, press the menu button on your remote control.")
 * Italian: "Questo DVD della Disney è stato arricchito con FastPlay Disney. Il filmato e una selezione di contenuti speziali inizieranno automaticamente. Per evitare FastPlay, puoi selezionare il pulsante "Menu principale" in qualsiasi momento. FastPlay inizierà in un istante." ("This Disney DVD has been enriched with Disney FastPlay. The movie and a selection of special content will start automatically. To avoid FastPlay, you can select the "Main Menu" button at any time. FastPlay will start in an instant.")
 * Dutch: "Deze Disney DVD is voorzien van Disney's Snelle Start. De film en een selectie bonusmateriaal zullen automatisch beginnen. Kies op elk gewenst moment de knop "Hoofdmenu" om Snelle Start te negeren. Snelle Start begint over een ogenblikje." ("This Disney DVD features Disney's FastPlay (lit. Quick Start). The movie and a selection of bonus material will start automatically. At any time, choose the "Main Menu" button to ignore Quick Start. Quick Start starts in a moment.")
 * Portuguese (Portugal): "Este Disney DVD tem Disney FastPlay. O seu filme e vos seleção de bonus são iniciados automaticamente. Para saltar FastPlay, selecione o comando tecla "Menu" em qualquer altura. O FastPlay vai começar." ("This Disney DVD has Disney FastPlay. Your movie and bonus selection will start automatically. To skip FastPlay, select the "Menu" key command at any time. FastPlay will start.")
 * Swedish: "Denna Disney DVD har försetts med Disneys FastPlay. Din film samt utvalt bonusmaterial kommer automatiska visas. För avbryta FastPlay, trycker du när som helst på menyknappen. FastPlay startar om ett ögonblick." ("This Disney DVD has been equipped with Disney's FastPlay. Your film plus selected bonus material will be played automatically. To cancel FastPlay, press the menu button at any time. FastPlay begins in a moment.")
 * Norwegian: "Denne DVDen fra Disney er utvidet med Disney's FastPlay. Filmen og et utvalg bonusmateriale vil starter automatisk. For avslutte FastPlay, kan du velge "Hovedmeny" knappen når som helst. FastPlay starter straks." ("This DVD from Disney has been extended with Disney's FastPlay. The movie and a selection of bonus material will start automatically. To quit FastPlay, you can select the "Main Menu" button at any time. FastPlay starts immediately.")
 * Danish:"Denne Disney DVD indeholder Disneys FastPlay. Din film og dit valg af bonusmateriale vil begynde automatisk. Det er til enhver tid muligt at fravælge FastPlay via hovedmenuen. FastPlay starter om et øjeblik." ("This Disney DVD contains Disney's FastPlay. Your movie and bonus material selection will begin automatically. It is always possible to deselect FastPlay via the main menu. FastPlay will start in a moment.")
 * Korean: "이 DVD는 디즈니 패스트 플레이 기능이 추가되었습니다. 여러분이 선택한 영화와 엄선된 보너스 장면들이 자동으로 시작됩니다. 패스트 플레이 기능을 생략하시려면 "초기 메뉴" 버튼을 누르세요. 곧 패스트 플레이를 시작합니다." ("This DVD features Disney's FastPlay. Your chosen movie and selected bonus scenes will start automatically. To bypass the FastPlay function, press the initial menu button. FastPlay will begin soon.")
 * Polish: "To DVD jest wyposażone w opcję Szybki Start. Odtwarzanie wybrane do filmów i dodatków specjalnych rozpocznie się automatycznie. Aby zobaczyć wszystkie dostępne opcje, wybierz "Menu Główne". Opcja Szybki Start rozpocznie się za chwilę." ("This DVD is equipped with the FastPlay (lit. Quick Start) option. Playback selected for movies and extra materials starts automatically. To see all available options, select "Main menu". The FastPlay option will start in a moment.")
 * Czech: "Toto DVD je vybavené Disney'ho systémom FastPlay. Váš film a výběr bonusů se spustí automaticky. A chcete vymykat FastPlay, zmáčknete kdykoliv tlačítko menu. FastPlay se spustí za chvíli." ("This DVD is equipped with Disney's FastPlay system. Your movie and bonus selection will start automatically. And if you want to delete FastPlay, you press the menu button at any time. FastPlay will start shortly.")
 * Russian: "Этот диск имеет функцию FastPlay. Сейчас начнётся воспроизведение всех материалов, размещённых на этом диске. Если вы не хотите воспользоваться данной функцией, выберите пункт "Главное меню". Вы можете выйти в главное меню в любой момент, нажав кнопку "Меню" на пульте." ("This disc has a FastPlay function. Now the playing of all materials placed on this disc will begin. If you do not want to use this function, select the "Main menu" item. You can go to the main menu at any time by pressing "Menu" button on the remote control.")
 * Finnish: "Tämä DVD on varustettu Disney's FastPlay toiminnolla. Elokuva ja osa lisämateriaalista alkavat automaattisesti. FastPlay toiminnon voi ohittaa kaukosäätimen Menu-näppäimellä. FastPlay alkaa aivan kohta." ("This DVD is equipped with the Disney FastPlay feature. The movie and few of the bonus features will start automatically. The FastPlay feature can be skipped with the remote's Menu button. FastPlay starts very soon.")
 * Mandarin: "这片迪士尼DVD提供了马上看的功能. 会自动播放影片干部份精选的特别收入内容. 如果使用马上看的功能请按主选单的按键. 迪士尼马上看功能稍后即将开始." ("This Disney DVD provides the FastPlay (lit. Watch Immediately) function. It will automatically play the selected special content of the movie. If you use the function to watch immediately, please press the button of the main menu. Disney's FastPlay feature will start soon.")
 * Arabic: ".هذا دي في دي من ديزني مزود بخاصيه تشغيل سريع. يبدأ الفيلم و اختيارك من المواد الاضافيه تلقائيا. لتجاوز تشغيل السريع اضغط على زر القائمه الرئيسيه في اي وقت. تشغيل السريع سيبدأ الآن" ("This DVD from Disney comes with the FastPlay (lit. Quick Launch) feature. The movie and your selection of add-ons starts automatically. To bypass FastPlay, press the main menu button at any time. FastPlay will start now.")
 * Turkish: "Bu DVD, Disney'in gelişmiş FastPlay özelliğine sahiptir. Film ve bonus oynatım özellikleri otomatik olarak başlayacaktır. FastPlay'i geçmek istiyorsanız "Ana Menü" tuşuna basınız. FastPlay birazdan başlayacak." ("This DVD features Disney's advanced FastPlay feature. Movie and bonus playback features will start automatically. If you want to skip FastPlay, press the "Main Menu" button. FastPlay will start soon.")
 * Hungarian: "Ez a DVD Walt Disney Gyorsmenü funkció. A film és az extrák Gyorsjátszás automatikusan elkezdődik. A Gyorsmenüből a Főmenü gomb megnyomásával bármikor ki lehet lépni. A Gyorsmenü azonnal elindul." ("This is the Walt Disney DVD FastPlay (lit. Quick Menu) feature. The movie and extras will start automatically with Quick play. You can exit FastPlay at any time by pressing the Main Menu button. FastPlay will start immediately.")
 * Romanian: "Acest DVD Disney este îmbunătățit cu Disney FastPlay. Filmul dumneavoastră și o selecție de bonusuri vor începe automat. Pentru a sări peste FastPlay, selectați butonul main meniu. FastPlay va începe într-o clipă." ("This Disney DVD is enhanced with Disney FastPlay. Your movie and a selection of bonuses will start automatically. To skip FastPlay, select the main menu button. FastPlay will start in an instant.")
 * Greek: "Αυτό το DVD της Ντίσνεϊ περιέχει το FastPlay της Ντίσνεϊ. Οι ταινίες σας και μία επιλογή από επιπρόσθετες δυνατότητες θα αρχίσει αυτόματα. Για να παρακάμψετε το FastPlay, επιλέξτε το κουμπί του Κυρίως Μενού όποτε θέλετε. Το FastPlay θα αρχίσει άμεσα." ("This Disney DVD contains Disney's FastPlay. Your movies and a selection of additional features will start automatically. To bypass FastPlay, select the Main Menu button whenever you want. FastPlay will start immediately.")

Availability: Fairly common. Seen on all DVD releases by Disney with the "FastPlay" feature since Mickey, Donald and Goofy: The Three Musketeers. This also appears on Pixar releases starting with the 2011 release of The Incredibles. Notably, one of the only instances where it actually did what it advertised was on the 2009 Big Wave Edition DVD of Lilo & Stitch (due to that release not having previews).

Editor's Note: While this logo is decently animated, the enhancement remains rather infamous for how it claims to play the movie "fast" and "automatically", when it really just plays the movie after a ton of trailers. This inspired numerous articles from disgruntled parents, and later became a minor internet meme.